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Asking a girl to prom can be pretty nerve-racking, even if you think she’s likely to say yes. There are all kinds of doubts swimming around in your head: what if she says no? What if I get nervous and mess up? What if I come across as weird?

Don't be afraid to ask a girl to prom

Having confidence is always the best way to handle any romantic affair — including asking a girl to prom. Being confident not only increases the likelihood of receiving a yes, it also will make it easier if she says no. However, confidence doesn’t come to everybody easily, and sometimes a push in the right direction can make a huge difference.

How are you going to ask?

If you’re trying to come up with a creative and cute idea to ask her to prom, that’s always a good choice, though I would only recommend it if you’re confident she’ll say yes (or don’t care if you get turned down). If you’re looking for cute ideas, I suggest you read my post that has some suggestions. I’m going to be assuming that you’re just going to walk up and ask her, however.

How to ask her

If you know the girl well, you can make small talk with her beforehand. If you’ve barely (or never) spoken to her, just launch into it. You don’t need a fancy lead-in — just be forward and ask, “Will you go to prom with me?” and go from there. I wouldn’t even recommend asking if she has a date already — if you ask her, “do you have a date yet?”, it’s pretty clear what you’re going to ask next. You might as well get it over with.

Don’t make asking any more complex then you have to. The more you think about it, the more nervous you will be. That said, there are some good tips to bear in mind:

Don’t put her on a pedestal.

No matter how attractive, smart, fun, or cute the girl is, don’t put her on a pedestal. She’s just a human being — like you, your family, and your friends. Do your best to avoid giving her too much status in your mind — this will make you far more nervous than you would be.

Imagine how a confident person would ask her

You don’t always have to be confident — sometimes faking it works just as well. Think to yourself how a confident person would ask her and keep that in the back of your mind while you’re talking to her.

Do not rehearse it in your mind.

This is a huge deal. If you’re trying to script out what you’re going to say, don’t. When you talk, it will sound very scripted and rehearsed. There’s also no way you can predict what she’s going to say, so you may become flustered if she says something you don’t expect. If you start to feel your mind wandering down the road of rehearsing the situation, stop it. You’ll do much better if you handle the situation in the moment.

Give yourself a challenge

This sounds a bit contradictory — why would you want to make it harder?

When giving presentations in class, I learned that I can feel less nervous if I try to do something above and beyond — maybe focusing on looking around a lot, or on my tone of voice. By making it harder for myself, I gained confidence because I knew it takes confidence to do what I was doing.

How can you apply this to asking a girl to prom? Maybe ask her while she’s with her friends instead of trying to approach her when she’s alone. Approaching her in front of her friends takes far more guts,  but it takes confidence to do it. That knowledge may help you feel more assured about asking her. It will also earn you brownie points because you’re asking in front of her friends.

If you’re not a confident person, then asking a girl is very nerve-racking, but it’s far from impossible. Do you have any tips that worked for you?

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